Not even a single relationship is perfect, we work hard to make it perfect! Women are very complicated species! They can love, loathe,care,disgust,bitch,support all at once to a single person. Men can never understand this complexity of emotions which is important for her survival and sustainment of the system. Poor them! Today I am going to present before you some self accomplished women who  are modern,suave, live their lives and yet maintain a healthy  MIL- DIL(mom in law-daughter in law) relationship and thus defining a whole new definition of feminism.  Read,Cherish, Show your Mums and Mums in laws (and try to hate her a bit less !) he he!………………….. So gear up to learn these superwomen tales straight from their hearts! And modern men it’s a must read for you too. It might help you creating a better relationship with your DIL-MIL( dad in law-mom in law)

P.S- Sorry Ekta Kapoor from bottom of my heart!

Richi Gadihoke

Alumni of Miranda house (ji ha Miranda house Delhi university), herself single child but mom of two adorable kids. She is currently teaching in one of Delhi’s best schools past twelve years while attaining that perfectly perfect balance of work life,personal life, mum life and In laws life! I know, I know too much to believe but that’s true… husband is happy,kids love her,her in laws adore her and her parents feel proud of their grooming. And yes her husband is a brigadier which means she owes everything in her life which you only see in Karan Johar movies. But but the twist is that she is a self made woman, lives her own life while supporting her husband all too much, her kids are performing well academically, As teacher she has touched people’s heart and works really hard just like any other lady from 9-5 wala schedule. But at the same time she is equally understanding to younger army wives (trying very hard to inculcate good practice and nice example to them) and supportive to jawan’s families (trying her best to create a difference). Now all those people who say army wives do nothing please read it twice and yes also those ladies who say senior wives do nothing read it thrice.

And what kind of relationship such a self sustaining,dignified and powerful lady holds with her mother in law??? Well read her own version in her own words…

“My MIL is 79yrs old and retired as English teacher from a government school. She is a woman of substance, well read and open minded. Out of 10 siblings she is the most educated one.Though there are many incidents but two incidents touched my heart particularly which made me respect her more as a person and as a woman!

Though I have always been fond of cooking but wasn’t an expert those early days just. So one day I took it upon myself to make ‘Palak paneer’ but when I opened the cooker all I could see was greenish water. I didn’t know what to do but my Mil promptly came to my rescue and announced to everyone that today  spinach soup is in dinner. Haha, it still makes me laugh.

Secondly when my daughter was born then our neighbors came to congratulate us but started sympathizing. You know the people in 90s! My mother in law firmly held my daughter in her arms and said “We are extremely happy, A girl is born in our family after 4 generations. Nothing could have been prouder than this.”

Harsha Srimali / Suveena Srimali 66

Do you remember how our dadis would say that women their age were ‘sarvgun sampann’ with complete possession of 36 guns. She is one of those kind of woman. She is post graduate in commercial arts and a professional artist, make paintings on order,sell jwelleries,bakes cake to perfections, make sweets,create new flavors and combinations done beautician course , design dresses etc. Amazing isn’t it ? Well this is just one aspect, don’t forget that she fulfills all her duties perfectly as an colonel’s wife and she is also a proud possessor of a happy and proud mum in law back home. And this is what she has to say

“My MIL is an astrologer “gold medalist. Yeah! I keep flaunting it.When I fell in love with my (to be) hubby, I was doubtful if my father will approve of this relation, since we belonged to the same family, though four generations apart and my father being a genetics professor was skeptic of marriages in close relation. My Mil stood by us. She called me up & spoke to me and assured me that we had support of elders and everything would be fine. That sowed the seeds of a strong relationship between us and from that day my respect for her has only grown.She comes from a large family of 10 siblings, 8 of them being women. As they are quick to pinch on issues,  we the newly weds (even till now) are the butt of their light banter. She has always stood by us and protected us from from their light banter”

Vijita Chauhan/ Usha Chauhan

Well, she is all new breed of army wives.One day she’s in US,the other day flying to Europe, She gets back to her humble fauji quarters only to leave for China next day. Hell yeah! travelling around the globe with all the beautiful people of TV and Film industry. Yes, She is a TV producer at NDTV and she has an entire team with her to assist her. But whenever this girl is inside the cantonment ..oh my my… the girl in minis at Paris just a day before would be properly covered in sarees organising welfares while trying to learn from her seniors and assisting them for ladies meet, just like any pther responsible Major’s wife. And you know what is amazing about this girl that she also holds a lovely MIL-DIL relationship. She talks her heart out and says

“My MIl is a teacher at Saint Pauls Lucknow. I know her before my marriage as ours was an love marriage. We both were neighbours and we had a courtship period of two years. It was tough for us to go sit in a restaurant and catch up but you know in spite of lot of protests from our family members, she was the only one who took a stand and said that I can totally enter her house before marriage. She supported us, went against literally everyone and performed a puja before I entered the house. This was immediate after our engagement.

Second incident I want to share is that I am too involved into NGOs for disabled people. Just to support me she started coming with me and started devoting herself. Now every year we go home, she takes out her time and we go together. and you know what… rest no one in the family is interested not even my husband! haha..that tells all what kinna bond we share!” 

Akansha Saini/ Sangeeta saini 65

Occupation… A proud homemaker

The words mother in law elicits many  thoughts and feelings… For me it brings to mind all the positive and warm emotions… I’ve been blessed with a mother in law who shares my likes and dislikes in almost all aspects… My comfort level with her is evident by the sheer fact that after the birth of both my kids I came back directly to my in law’s home from the hospital instead of going to my own parents home who by the way are staying in the same city… In my 10 year old marriage to an infantry officer.. I’ve stayed more with my mom in law than with my husband….the bond has only strengthened with the passing years… She has been a sounding board for me… on occasions listening to complaints about her own son.
Most sons complain that their wife doesn’t cook like their mother but in my case I’ve copied my mother in law’s style of cooking to such an extent that even she is unable to make out the difference… She has truly passes on all her trade secrets to me
Like any other relationship.. This one also had its ups and downs.. It is inevitable to have disagreements and arguments.. If these are absent then it signifies an abnormal relationship… So… Whatever be the issue.. It has been dealt with and thrown out of the window and v have moved on……
Its a tough to be a mother in law even though most of us believe otherwise… A new person coming to the family does change a lot of things and the dynamics are affected both ways…
I have had the best of times with my mom in law… She continues to be a source of unending support for me..

Kanchan Chandra / Sumila Chandra 55

Occupation – MBA/HR

“She never forgets to give gifts on my birthdays,anniversary and Karwachauth. I love it as she puts too much effort into sending all those to me if she’s not surprising me by visiting me on these special occasions of my life.It’s been 4.5 year of my marriage and she never let me make rotis as once my mom said in general that I don’t like making rotis. Even if I get up by 10 AM she is totally cool with it. I can wear whatever I feel like in her presence. I mean everything about her makes me feel like that she’s my beloved mother only.”

Then, there are many other such positive stories around us which shows us how two mature people can make such an important life long relationship work with little understanding and appreciation for each other and how such relationships can work without the involvement of men of the house? How they totally disappoint Ekta Kapoor?  And it all ultimately leads to create ultimate bliss, prosperity and peace at home.

There’s also one more duo I ‘d like to mention Shweta Tiwari/ Janki Tiwari though she’s a civilian but what touched about her story was that her In laws gifted her a car on her birthday only because she works as an HR professional in Wipro  and was shuffling daily on her go to various conveyance modes. Also they took all the efforts to print “to the best bahu in the world ” tag before gifting her a new pair of shoes! Now what can be classier!

So People, open your eyes and try to focus on positivity around…….

As you are reading this I can make out you love army life then you must not miss this thrilling romance of an army officer and his army girlfriend. An extraordinary tale of love laughter betrayal and war

Soldier’s Girl: Love Story of a Para-Commando (First)